Deepak Chopra: Taking these 3 steps will make people like and trust you at work

by | Oct 18, 2018

Ask yourself: Are you a giver or a taker? Be honest with yourself.

If you were slow to answer, there’s a chance you may not be deliberately acting as a ‘giver’ at work, or someone who gives to others without hesitation.

This trait is essential for establishing meaningful relationships in any aspect of our lives, but especially at work. All too often, we are focused on advancing ourselves and pursuing our interests. We’re focused on what we can ‘take’ from the world, a habit that causes our relationships to suffer.

Being a giver can also help you build a reputation for kindness. People will notice that you’ve taken the time to understand their needs and priorities. They’ll remember how you’ve made them feel.

As a result, you’ll have strengthened bonds and built trust, essential for collaborating, working well with others and getting big things accomplished.

Here is a three-step method for how you can follow the law of giving and receiving at work and help yourself and others find success.

Give a daily gift

Make a commitment to yourself that you are going to give at least one gift a day to a colleague. This doesn’t have to be a physical gift like a box of chocolates. It can be as simple as a smile, invitation to go to lunch together or a compliment. You can easily make someone feel good by telling them “Congratulations” or “Great job.”

These simple phrases will go a long way in making someone feel noticed, important and worthwhile. Just think how you would feel if someone stopped by your office and said, “I just wanted to tell you that you did a great job.”

Be gracious when you receive

When someone gives you a gift, that person is kicking off a cycle of kindness and consideration. After this kind gesture, you might be inspired to return the favor or even provide that person with a compliment in the future. That person who gave you the gift will feel good and want to give again to others. Generosity breeds generosity.

Do what you can to keep this loop flowing. Always be kind, considerate, and deliberate in your thanks. Don’t deny someone the pleasure of giving. Don’t shut down a gift or short circuit that loop of generosity. Even the simplest “thank you” will go a long way in making your colleagues feel appreciated.

Quietly wish everyone well

Whenever you meet someone new, whether it’s an intern or client, say to yourself “I wish the best for you.” This will put you in a positive frame of mind and help you see the good in people.

When you quietly think good things about people, you may be surprised that these things will start to happen. You will begin acting on your positive thoughts. You will start helping your colleagues achieve their desires and aspirations.

In turn, they will feel grateful toward you and help you with your goals and desires. You will learn through experiencing it how truly better it is to give than to receive.

[This article was also published in CNBC]

Commentary by Deepak Chopra and Kabir Sehgal

Deepak Chopra is the co-author of The Healing Self, founder of The Chopra Foundation and co-founder of Jiyo and The Chopra Center for Wellbeing.

Kabir Sehgal is a New York Times best-selling author. He is a former vice president at JPMorgan Chase, multi-Grammy Award winner and U.S. Navy veteran. Chopra and Sehgal are the co-creators of Home: Where Everyone Is Welcome, inspired by American immigrants.